Just a quick update on what I have been doing the last couple of days! Right now Im on the couch with my duvee, relaxing! Had a really great weekend. Hung out with good friends, met some cool people, and I expect to go out and meet with a cool friend of mine in a couple of hours. But back to my Great weekend…

My friend Mats and me went boxing friday afternoon. We actually did about 10 training rounds in the ring (notice the black eye on Mats and the scatches on our faces :))… thought I was going to puke like three times. But wow, did I learn alot! After a great exercise, we went home. We had a living Lobster in the fridge, a bit net of Muscles and a bunch of Norwegian lobsters (you know, the small juicy ones). So, we uncorked a bottle of Silverlake Sauvignon Blanc and started cooking. There is nothing like cooking with friends, especially I love it when you have some really great quality raw materials to work with! Eating seafood with your fingers, having chilli, garlic, and onion all over your hands and fingers, is really sexy… too bad we did not invite any girls, but now I know what I will do when I bring a date at home for dinner in the near future for sure, cutlery is going to be out of the question

After that a few drinks, in a bar around the corner, with even more friends! Relaxed, perfect…

Yesterday, I went with the same friend to a Spa, and had a chilled afternoon. First we scrubbed our whole bodies, with salt and wood. With a bit of hangovers, we started off going to the steambath, and stretched out our sore muscles, after that frying in the sauna for a while. Then we had some food, and a beer (what is beer doing in a wellness center?) after that I went to a waterbed with heating lamps… I have no clue whatever what they where supposed to do, but I fell a sleep, and woke up half an hour later! Then a quick solarium and then home another nap, and a movie! Then off to meet my inspirational self help partner Thomas in town for a cup of coffee! Had a hard time pushing my limits on approaching people, but eventually, we really got to meet some cool people! That is what the whole exercise is about, pushing our comfort zone! It is really hard at times, but amazingly awarding. Thomas had taken some time for himself in a house on a small island, to clear his head. He was on fire yesterday. He just seemed to be able to lock in really quickly, and get some great responses from people! One of the hottest girls in the bar, was all over him, constantly touching him, whispering in his ears and all those Indicators of Interest. That is what Social Dynamics is all about. Cool Thomas, you really have grown. Hope I can get you to write about your Social Growth Journey in here!

This morning I went to eat breakfast with a friend of mine from Barcelona, who is staying at a fancy hotel near from here…. He has free breakfast, so he invited me ;)! So, I had a great weekend, and now my sister is back from her skiing vacation with her boyfriend, so hopefully I get to see her this evening, and hear about their trip! My brother in law, did some talking about going to a big car show that is on this weekend, so if we go, I think I can say that I had a weekend full of adventure, cool experiences, and plenty of relaxation!

/Kasper

A few weeks ago, I had a terrible chest pain, I tried to get over it my self, but it didnt help. It ended up with me going to the hospital, and they actually admitted me to the Cardiac Intensive Care Unit. I was pretty sure that nothing was wrong with my heart, and that it had to be a mistake. But what I noticed as I was in the hospital for a few days was that the people in here where very motivated to change their lifestyle. "Of course!" you might say, but this is actually VERY related to the whole Anthonny Robbins "Decision Making”. The most important thing in Personal development has nothing to do with wishing to change your life, or reading a bunch of material by the great personal growth gurus…. It has to do with your MOTIVATION!

Many times when I was new in this, I did read all the books I could come across on NLP, Personal Growth, How to get rich in 5 days and How to get your dream girl. That is all theory… If you read a book on skiing, will you know how to ski? One thing is theory and another thing is Practical application. But if you are not MOTIVATED how will you get to apply the theory on your self? It has to do with your MOTIVATION!

Back to the hospital… Imagine being hospitalized with a heart decease! Often those are closely related to a fat diet, low physical activity, smoking and maybe a lot of other things. What I noticed in the hospital was that all these obese people, where standing in line to the fruit basket. Some of these people had never before eaten a piece of fruit (really… never!!!). So, my dear reader, can you tell me what the reason for this sudden personal change is? Yes, you are absolutely right my friend… IT has to do with their MOTIVATION! These people are ofcourse very motivated to change their lives. They KNOW for sure, that if they don’t, they will (if lucky) be hospitalized in a short while again. If not hospitalized, they will be in the cemetery! ISNT THAT MOTIVATION?

If you are not going to the hospital, or have another direct MOTIVATION impact, you can look into NLP. For motivating people NLP is a great tool. Actually, in NLP there is something called a NLP LIFELINE. This lifeline first takes you through your future life if you DO NOT change… in ½ a year, 1 year 2 years and so on. This will give you a feeling of urgency to change… or “MOTIVATION” to change. Then we do the same, but this time you imagine your life if you do change! This might or might not motivate you to change, but no matter what I believe that you will feel a little more motivated after such a session. After that you will come to see that to change your life in a more positive way, it all has to do with your MOTIVATION!

I have made a NLP LIFELINE walk through HERE!

KasperLife is a self help or self improvement blog

There are two parts of KasperLife. One is the Diary, where I will try and tell you a little bit about my daily life, and how I am going on my personal development objectives. Then there is the other part. This part is more about general discussions on Personal Development theory. As there are a ton of motivational speakers outthere, who all have their theory on how to develop your personality, I would like to apply the theory on my person.

I have been studying personal growth for a years time now, and I noticed that there are quite a bit of commonalities between "The Secret", Anthonny Robbins, Brian Tracy, David DeAngelo, and many many others. So, first of all I want to identify the commonalities between those theories, through discussions on this blog. Along the way I am also applying the theory, on my own "body".

So, I have certain goals in life, which I have divided into interior and exterior goals. I will setup a Personal development Plan or Personal Growth Plan, which will identify goals, categorise them, identify which actions are needed to get there and of course setup deadlines for the part goals to be achieved.

So, what do I mean about Self Help or Self Improvement?

Well, Wikipedia states that Self Help or Self Improvement is a name for self guided improvement. this counts for several parts of your life such as economical self help, intellectual self improvement, or even emotional personal growth. Most of this is often based on a substantial psychological or spiritual basis.

To be able to call it "Self Help" we have to base it on our personal available resources such as public available information, self reliance and support groups or comunities. In those communities you can hook up with people with the same type of problems. There are a range of online communities as well as off line. I am going to make a forum, where you will be able to put out questions for others to answer, and come up with suggestions, and much more. One of the best ways of learning new theory is to teach others. So with that in mind you can use the forum for that, aswell. So, my self development forum is a place where people with similar problems can join together.

The huge variety of self help books and self help personal development movements are extremely popular these years, (and have been since the 70ies). Personally I believe that todays enormous interest can be linked to the Maslow hieracal Pyramid of Needs. In the western world we have our houses, cars, and a bunch of status symbols. Now we are urging for the next step - personal development which is under the last step - Self Actualisation.  (the picture is from learnmanagement2.com).

It all started with pocket psychology and early entrepreneurical start up forums, most of it being home spun advice.  But Richard Bandler and John Grinder formed a whole new way of motivating, removing limiting beliefs, and finding personal power. They where the founders of NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming. Today this is a great part of motivational speakers, coaches and even self help improvement theory and books. basically all the selfhelp improvement theory that is the basis for motivational speakers, has spread into the areas of businesses, psychology, psychotherapy, other types of therapy and education.

I have a self help group that i often go to. Self help group might sound a bit extreme, but for me it is actually more of a discussion group, and further to that, this is very important for motivation. This is what we call "signing contracts" in the self help world. I am also signing a contract with you guys, by writing my goals and objectives in this blog. further to that self help groups include friendships, emotional support, practical and experimental knowledge, identity, meaningful roles and a sense of belonging to a group. I do not consider myself metally ill, or depressed or unhappy for that matter, but I get great pleasure, and support from using my development group. These are a bunch of guys who like me, have a great interest in social dynamics and self development. We have all read a bunch of theory, and tried even more stuff out, so combined we have an enormous practical and theoretical knowledge. This is the self help area I am writing about in my blog. There are other uses of this term, but for me in this context;"Self help is often really peer-to-peer support.!"

Marketdata estimated the "self-improvement" market to be worth $8.5 billion in 2003 — including infomercials, mail-order catalogs, holistic institutes, books, audio cassettes, motivational speaker seminars, the personal coaching market, weight-loss and stress-management programs. Marketdata projected that the total market size would grow to over $11 billion by 2008.

Around the world anti selfhelpers suggests that self-help books and programs offer "easy answers" to difficult personal problems. I agree to a certain aspect of this.. If you are mentally ill, or psychologically in a bad way, self help books, and coaching is not the way out. Most coaches I know, always state that they only help healthy and happy people. If you have psychological problems I strongly suggest talking to a psychiatrist or seek professional help on a totally other level. Negative comments have been made on self-help books for containing pseudo-scientific assertions that will to mislead the readers, and a variety of authors have stated their negativity towards self-help authors and claims. A famous one is the Christopher Buckley’s "God is My Broker" (1998) in which he says: "The only way to get rich from a self-help book is to write one!".

Those are statements in which I do agree. Of course there are many books out there, and the writers do get rich. This though is only because most of the readers buy a little dream, instead of trying to change their life. Back to the motivation issue from above… The most important part of changing your lifestyle is to be motivated towards it. By motivated I dont mean like "I would like to change, make more money, stop smoking, get in better physical condition…!" No people need to really change and be aware that if they dont, they are going to hurt them selves. "Make that decision now!" as Anthonny Robbins states it. I actually stopped smoking by making a decission, not to make a wish.

Today, I want to get started on finishing my goals, and how to get there. But today Iam going to my parents place to help out my dad do his new webpage on a company he is starting up! So, I might not have a chance to get it done today, as I hope I will also have some time to get ready for work, tomorrow when the easter break is over! I would like to have my travelling goals done for 2008 tonight! I have my financial goals done, and quite a bit on how to reach those as well. It is all done, I just have to get them “online”. I am going to get my KasperLife goals put in the right chronological order this week. And last but not least, Iam going to get my 1,000 DKK (210 USD) out of the bank. The 210 USD is my weekly “Pocketmoney”. As i put in my financial goals, and how to get there, I have put away my credit card, and get 210 Dollars a week in cash as “pocketmoney”. This is my “FOOD & FUN MONEY”, and I have been doing this for 3 weeks now, and it work like a charm for me. I had a small “accident” when I went to a restaurant with a friend 2 weeks ago, and “overspent” a bit. All in all it has worked perfect though! As long as I have my current wage, I dont think my financial goals will change much, but it is important to go through your goals frequently to see if you should change them. As we constantly change (and the whole idea about this development blog is to change), our goals and objectives will also be in constant change. We do not just reach a goal and then that is that. We develop our goals along the way! That is the reason it is important to go through our goals frequently! I have to run off now, but I hope I get the time to get back soon!

Namaste

Btw.: Just thought about another goal for my blog…. It needs more pictures! So I want to have some pictures I can use on the blog

Today I was a bit hungover from yesterday! I went to a cocktail party at a friends place. He is living with his younger brother in the absolute city center, in a really nice brand new apartment. It was great fun and we had a huge range of different cocktails (it was a “bring-your-own-and-show-what-you-can-do-with-a-shaker-party”), so today has been very relaxed. This morning I went with my buddy, to a shopping mall for professionals and bought some stuff for his nightclub. Then we went to to a cafe (Bankeråt) and had some lunch… pretty boring food, but nice atmosphere though! after that we went to have a coffee at Pussy Galore, reading the newspaper, chatting with people… A pretty good day, and we where ready for the nights adventure had some awesome food, a nice bottle of wine, and then off to a friend of mines place for drinks… So today I made a new goal; I am going to cut down on the alcohol! More about how and so on under my goals!

I am sitting working on setting up my blog, and I noticed that I haven’t written any posts yet… just any daily day life posts! It is easter holidays and I am sitting in my couch, working on setting up my blog… there is a lot of work on describing who I am, why I am doing this and then the technical stuff. I am not satisfied with the layout of the site… I just took a wordpress template and tweaked it a little bit. I definately need a better header, something more catchy… But not focusing on all the work there is on making this the best blog out there, I must admit that I am really enjoying this, there is something therapeutic about writing on the subject of yourself. It is like I am facing some of the demons (just some of them ) in your life.

I actually have a little bit of a cold at the moment, and I have decided to take better care of the “vessel” (thanks; DeAngelo)

I have some great new about my financial situation (see financial goals): First of all I got some money back from the tax system (1893.3), and last week I got my money for vacations! In the company I work they pay 12% on my wages to a holiday account! So I just got 1682.94 from my old work, and i dont know how much I am going to get from my current work… I expect it to be around the same so in April, I am going to get 5259 USD. extra on my wage… this means that I have paid back my debt to my bank! only leaving one big post on my debts

DEAR READERS

Thank you so much for your appreciated time on this blog, which is all about sharing and giving motivation for personal change in your life.

The reason why I decided to write this blog started off about a year ago today. At that time I was not planning on writing a blog, or a book, or anything in that aspect… I was depressed! I did not know at the time, that I was depressed, and many readers will propably say: “That is not depression, you should see depression when it is bad, if you think THAT is depression!”. Well… I WAS depressed…

MY LIFE ONE YEAR AGO

A year ago I returned to Denmark from Mexico. I had a company with a mexican partner, which profesionally ran pretty well, but on the personal level, not that good… to be honest (and I want to be honest in this blog ) we were constantly fighting about anything we possibly could fight about, and basically behaving like little kids. So, I decided to go back home to Copenhagen! Christmas eve, 2006. My life in Mexico was perfect; I sorrounded myself with great friends, had a wonderfuld house, and best of all… I had a company that was actually making money! Not living an overwhelming life, but still… I was pretty proud of myself for what I acchieved up till that point. But the closer we came to christmas, the closer i came to my decision about leaving it all, as I knew that we where fighting each other too much in the company! On top of that, a headhunting company wanted to have me joining them for an interview, so I thought I was pretty safe. My new wage seemed pretty nice, and I was happy about the concept of coming “home” after 8 years away.

DENMARK

…was not that easy to get accustomed to though. The company who was headhunting me, told me that they had to hire another guy internally as they had had to lay off a lot of people, and therefore could not offer me the job. (after 3 interviews, and only one last chat with the CEO from Canada waiting). I was bummed… Feeling stupid, letting go of my company (without getting any money out of it), and basically living with my parents as a 30 year old. (Thank you mom and dad for you patience!) I got more and more frustrated and did not feel like getting a job… or… I would love to get a job, but could not oversee the challenge of actually seeking it, writing cvs and applications… so… as I had no money (could not even get support from the state, as I had worked abroad in many years) I just took a job in a wineshop. I was making shit money, worked my ass off. But in a way liked the idea that I did not have to think too much about work. It was an easy job, as I knew quite a bit about wines, but it was also a job I found a bit humiliating when talking to friends, and making new friends (as I mentioned earlier, I was away from Copenhagen for 8 years, so I had to build a new group of friends). I had a pretty big dept at the time, as I did not make that much money when I lived in Barcelona! Also, I had not paid of my loan for a Bachelors Degree in Business Management at ESERP University. So my depts was at that time about 170,000 DKK = 35,762.37 USD… at the time I was making about 11,400 DKK 2398.18 after taxes a month. With that much dept i felt i was only paying back the mortgage on the dept. I felt more and more bummed, stock in a bog i could not get out off. What the hell could I do? I was 30 years old, and now I rented a room in an appartment with 2 other guys, that I did not know… (and one of these guys where FREAKY!). Well, not much to it, but I think you guys more or less get the idea, that I was not satisfied with where life had taken me!
HOW DID THE SPARK IGNITE?

Last summer a good old friend, and a great source of inspiration, told me about a book he had read, which blew his mind! The book was called “The Game” by Neil Strauss, and I guess it is now the Bible in pick up communities. I did not feel I wanted to go and spend the money on a book, (that is how poor I felt) but a friend of mine had an audio tape version lying around. The book was as expected - Mind blowing. Not just to the fact that this little guy Neil or Style could grow from a little nerd, to a great hero and Idol of many young men. The idea in my head, that a person could grow, change, take over his own destiny… really peaked my interest. In the middle of this whole thing I actually pulled myself together, and started looking for new jobs. Within 2 weeks, I had a new job, in an Online Marketing bureau in the trendy part of Copenhagen.

HOW I LOST MY TELEVISION SET

I now spend most of my spare time looking for Self Development programmes, Pick Up Coaches and motivational speakers are a great source for getting a clue of what is out there! My problem was that I did not know of Anthonny Robbins, Brian Tracy, or any other Personal Development Guru. So, as I listened to the others, i wrote down anything I could use… a name, program, movie, what ever! Then I would search the internet, till I found a way of downloading or buying it! After a short while, I had more Coaching books, motivational cd’s, and weird movies lying around. And now the problem was not finding it, but finding the time to listen to it! So, one night after wasting too much time watching stupid television programs, I heard an audio tape with DeAngelo. He stated that if you could just spend the time you would normally spend in front of the television set, on a personal development program, imagine how much new stuff you would learn. At that time I thought that if I just knew the theory, behind things, I would have changed, so… I threw out my television! I actually liked the dramatic way of getting rid of my television, as I felt it was much more inspiring. From then on, I spent 1 - 2 hours everyday listening to audioprograms, reading pdf files on my computer, reading coaching books, studying NLP and so on.

THOMAS MY INTELIGENT MIRROR

I also got myself a “mirror”…. his name is Thomas, and he is one of the most inspiring guys I have ever met… I hope I can get him to write some stuff on this blog! By mirror, I mean a guy (it is actually a coaching expression, about how a country cannot see its own flaws… more about that in another post) who can tell you exactly what he thinks you are doing wrong, could do better and of course discussing a bunch of new things. This guy is probably the biggest reason for my motivation, changes, and in many other areas. I found Thomas about 6 months ago, on an online forum, discussion about the art of pick up…. We went out and did some applications of the theories we have learned! But I would like Thomas to write about this.

MY NEW LIFE

I am actually not really sure that my life did change… It probably has a bit but I am not sure. As DeAngelo states;”It is important to log your improvements, because improvement will delete its own tracks!” So that was actually the whole point about starting this blog. I still was not sure how I wanted to do this, because I want it to be useable for myself, as well as others! I believe that the blog is about the application of most of all the theory outthere (that Iam sofar aware off). The idea about Kasperlife is to define some goals in every aspect of my life, and work towards them using coaching, personal development theory, and motivational speakers audio and videos! I will make a list of my inspirations and a short introduction to those! Se it here (Link is not working yet ;))

I think it is of great importance that I am not where I want to be yet (and have had the epiphany that I propably will never as my goals constantly change) I have changed a bit during the last couple of months, but iam also very motivated to tell you about my improvement. Further to this I will have a dairy part which will give an impression about my daily life turning into KASPERLIFE. My dreamversion of my dreamlife.

So…
I need to define what I really want. I need some specific goals and objectives, so that Iam not just running around in circles with undefined goals. More about that in a later post!

Hope you enjoyed my “biography”… please let me know anything you think that is needed to improve this!

Kasper

Dear Readers of KasperLife,

 Thank you so much for your appreciated time on this blog, which is all about sharing and giving motivation for personal change in your life.
I have been spending some time trying to define how I want to use this blog for my optimal personal use… The thing is that it is a combination of a lifestyle blog, and a

personal development tool/ blog! So… there will be a LifeStyle part and a part about my personal development. In other words… the personal development part should also lead

to my wished for life style! So… this part is a bit of thoughts about what shall go into this blog!

The LIFESTYLE part:

When creating this blog, I did it mainly to define the lifestyle that I would like to acchieve, therefore I am writing alot about my lifestyle, and maybe a great part about the

lifestyle that I would want.

The PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT part:

First of all I am not sure that Personal Development is the right word for the process, because it is devolopment in all areas in my life! I created a program for this that I am

calling “Kasper Life” which I will get into under my pages!

I will be using all the theories of Motivatinal speakers to acchieve my dreamlife: Kasper Life! I will try not to be discriminating of the theories even though some of the

theories I have knowledge to are a bit over the top. It is also important for the readers to know that I am no expert to this, but I am a normal person applying those to myself.

I hope that the results I get out of this, is the jury of how well they work. Sometimes I might forget to quote a writer, motivational speaker or coach, or I might come up with

conclusions that others might have come to before me…. That is just a part of this Blog! I sincerely hope that you will appriciate my blog!

Hi guys and girls,

1st of all Iam just an ordinary guy, with an ordinary job, an ordinary appartment (not even, I live with a friend of mine). And Iam getting sick of my ordinary life!

 So… I decided to do something about it! That actually happened a while ago, but now I decided to write a blog about my Objectives, and how I am going to get there!

I will be using the theory of many Motivational Speakers, NLP gurus, Pick Up Gurus and so on! So, this blog is not a blog about my own theory, but more the application of the theory of others!